Sunday, June 27, 2010


So I just heard about this upcoming SyFy original filmed-in-Bulgaria movie slated for release next year - Mega Python vs. Gatoroid (more like Monty Python vs. Gatorade, amirite?). What the balls.

Am I the only one who can look at a title like that (or any number of other direct-to-SyFy movies released in the past decade) and think, holy shit, it would be awesome to work on a film like that.

I mean seriously. That would be about the coolest damn experience ever. To be the PA out of shot squirting "bug juice" out of old ketchup dispensers onto the actors, or waving a paper mache claw in the face of some former teen pop sensation from the 80's...I think I'd just about cream my shorts. My very own Ed Wood experience.

There's The Asylum, that studio that comes out with similarly-titled low-budget knock-offs of far more popular films, like Transmorphers or Snakes on a Train, and now their latest effort - Titanic 2. Honestly, they shouldn't be looked at as a legitimate studio with an ultra-low budget. They should be seen as backyard filmmakers with a really high budget.

Watch any of their films. It's completely weak. You think to yourself, I could make a better film than this pile of shit. I'm sure you could...but would you really want to? These guys aren't trying to win any Oscars here. If I had the same exact budget, and access to the same actors as one of their films, guess what? I'd probably do some dumb monster flick too. Why? Cause it would be fucking awesome that's why. It would be a light-hearted romp. The guys at The Asylum are having fun doing what they do, and they're making money at the same time. In my book, there's nothing wrong with that.

For all the crap they take, I'd love to get a gig on one of their films. I should just go down to LA one day and kick in their door and beg to work on their next project. Hell, I'd do it for free. It's all about having a film like Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus on your resume. At least they'd film in this country, and not, say, Bulgaria.